Holy Mess: Cold rice noodle and sesame chicken salad -- or -- How I spent my time before and after the gym

Like a giant Americanized spring roll dumped into a bowl.

Evening workout schedules tend to dominate dinner considerations in the Saylor-Oliver household:

prep time versus Episcopal High School sports team practice (seminary families can't use the gym 'til the high schoolers are done with after-school practice)
electrolyte loading or replenishing requirements (bikram yoga is at 6 or 8)
caloric balance of pre-workout snack to post-workout feast (don't eat too much too soon or too little too late)

You get the idea.

Today's constraints were 6 p.m. yoga for Kristin and 6:30 gym opening for Kyle. Dinner had to be close to ready before leaving for the gym, so we wouldn't be too famished by the time we finished preparing it after arriving home.

The other relevant constraint was my complicated relationship with Asian food: I love it, but I have no idea how to cook it. We don't have any Asian food cookbooks, and I've never had an Asian-cooking role model (not much Asian in the Oliver household or in the Boy Scouts, which are the two places I learned to cook).

In particular, I always want to make spring rolls, but it's never as convenient as I think it should be to find the rice-paper wrappers (even at Fairway!). Tonight was my second attempt at a sort-of deconstructed spring roll, in salad form, with noodles replacing the wrappers. It turned out to be an easy dish to "stage"; I cooked the chicken, made the sauce, and assembled the cabbage-based salad before I left, which left only the noodles to cook in our sweats and pajamas when we got home.

See below for the recipe, such as it is, and some illustrated commentary. Let me add, in closing, that rice noodles remain a mystery to me. They tasted fine when added to the crispy salad, but I have absolutely no idea if they were over- or under-cooked. Any rice-noodle experts out there?

Sauce (inspired somewhat by my memory of this incredible dipping sauce, which I've just re-found)

4 tablespoons sesame oil
1 tablespoon reduced sodium soy sauce
3 tablespoons water
2 tablespoons rice vinegar
juice from one small lime
2 green onions, chopped
salt, pepper

Whisk all ingredients together in bowl or measuring cup. The sauce seemed to really benefit from an hour or so in the fridge.

Humming "green onions" while chopping and shouting "wheeesk"
like Eddie Izzard are strictly optional.

Salad

10 ounces (i.e., one pre-washed bag) shredded cabbage
2 medium carrots, grated
1 red pepper, julienned (I omitted because ours was moldy inside--gross)
4 chicken breast "tenderloins" (aka chicken strips)
6 ounces rice noodles
cilantro and crushed peanuts for garnish

Season the chicken and cook over medium heat in a frying pan (I used sesame oil and added some sesame seeds). Remove chicken from pan and shred. Add some of the crushed peanuts, then return to the pan and cook for about a minute. Deglaze (would you call it that in this case?) with just a bit of the sauce, enough to pick up some of the browned goodness and give the chicken some flavor. Cook another minute or so.

Shredding chicken is, inexplicably, one of my favorite cooking tasks.

Out of the frying pan and ... back into the frying pan.

Remove from pan and layer with cabbage, carrots, and pepper in some way that seems good to you. Cover and refrigerate as you like. When ready to finish, cook the noodles about two minutes in boiling water, then drain and rinse in cold water until chilled.

Really excited about the food processor we accidentally found
out we're getting for Christmas.

Ready for the gym.

Add cooked noodles to salad, dress, and toss. Garnish with cilantro and chopped peanuts, preferably from this tiny little garnish bowls. Also some Sriracha.